When I knew James Holmes, the , he was Jimmy. I was his 5th grade teacher.
Back then, in 1998-99, Holmes lived in Castroville, Calif., a tiny town of 5,000. Since the theater shooting in Aurora, I鈥檝e talked about Jimmy with one of his former classmates; let鈥檚 call him Chris.
Jimmy was . He had two really good friends, including Chris, both sharp like him鈥攊n fact, top of the class.
I trusted James Holmes so much that when he finished his assignments, I let him and another student create a class website. Mind you, this was 1998 and our computers were primitive; we had to write lines and lines of code to do anything. Jimmy worked on this independently, and he did it well.
Chris reminded me how I鈥檇 race students in the field behind the school: 鈥淥nly two kids beat you in our year, and James was one of them.鈥� He continued, 鈥淢r. Karrer, those were the best years of my school years鈥�5th grade.鈥�
Then a pause, and: 鈥淲hat do you think happened to him?鈥�
What happened to him? James had everything going for him. He lived in the wealthy part of town; I鈥檓 pretty sure both of his parents had white-collar jobs.
James Eagan Holmes passed through my life for one year. Could I have done anything that would have led to a different outcome?"
Yet Chris, who was asking the question, had been poked in the eyes by fate. His mom died before 5th grade, but he kept up with school and plugged away. He was, and still is, a sweet, lovable, biggish kid.
His dad was a Vietnam vet who worked day and night at their restaurant to make ends meet. The dad confided in me a few years ago that he had cancer, but 鈥渃ancer isn鈥檛 mean enough to get me.鈥� And he beat it: He鈥檚 still plugging away at that restaurant six years later.
So in the end, Chris turned out A-OK . . . and Jimmy didn鈥檛.
鈥淗ow can we know?鈥� I answered Chris. 鈥淧erhaps he became psychotic. It shows up in people in their 20s. Maybe he used wicked sanity-eating drugs like OxyContin, meth, crack, and it destroyed his mind. I don鈥檛 know.
鈥淧erhaps he just turned to the dark side? I don鈥檛 know . . . don鈥檛 know.鈥�
I do know a few things, though. James (Jimmy) Eagan Holmes, by all accounts, has committed a brutal, evil, and, it seems, very premeditated, horrible act.
Some people snap. They鈥檒l commit crimes of passion, commit dark acts under the influence of drugs, anger, lust, misperception, racism, ignorance, and poor or wrong decisionmaking.
And I think as a civilized society all we can do is try to minimize the impact these individuals have upon us. No civilian should have or own a military-style weapon. No civilian should be able to purchase body armor. And I say this as a gun owner.
As an educator, I鈥檇 add that we desperately need nurses, psychologists, and social workers in our elementary schools. In this era of No Child Left Behind and Race to the Top, too often they aren鈥檛 even on the radar. Testing supersedes all.
Finally, I wonder: James Eagan Holmes passed through my life for one year. Could I have done anything that would have led to a different outcome? Probably not.
But I also fear that in schools somewhere out there, more James Holmeses are festering.
To the people of Aurora, I鈥檓 very, very, very sorry.
And to Chris, I鈥檓 so proud of you and your dad.
